So what is food to me? I know a lot of people turn to food for comfort, replace a man with ice cream, rejection with cookies, even a scraped knee with a lolly. It's something we are taught from tiny...but why does it stay with some of us and not others? Actually I don't even think that that is a fair comment, because is seems to change day to day. Myself I have experience the ease of saying no, every avoidance gave me a high, every raised eyebrow pushing m further. But this time....man!! It is hard...I don't see immediate results, I give up so easily and I am far to easily persuaded! I have prided myself on my iron willpower....but where has it gone? I stuff my face...regretting it before it has even reached my mouth, or even the wrapper taken off, yet I still do it.
I think I use food as a distraction, something else to think about or do, to avoid doing or thinking about the thIngs that really need dealing with....but then I don't sleep well at all, am to tired and don't do the things that need to be done, and then feel overwhelmed again. I don't want to be this person, I need my control back. And the only way is to get a grip of myself and just damn well crack on!
Tomorrow is a new day, the first day of the rest of my life, a new attitude, a new set of promises, and new goal to achieve yadda yadda yadda .....I don't pray and I don't believe but if I did I would beg for the strength to make myself thin again I.......please woman get a grip of yourself!
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